Saturday, September 27, 2008

I'm gonna soak up the sun

Most of our days on vacation, Roger and I lived by the lyrics of Sheryl Crow's 2002 hit, "Gonna Soak Up the Sun." However, long gone are the days of lying on the beach in the warm sun without a care in the world. As you can see, Rog and I have struggled to find a place to catch rays at home. Although quickly waning with the onset of fall, we did manage to find a tiny spot in our dining room to share.

Bad weather at the beach is better than wonderful weather at work. During the two days of wind and rain, Roger and I passed the time by learning some essential homemaking skills. Mom says that at the very least, a well-rounded man needs to know the basics of cooking, computing, and child rearing.

Cooking - Lesson 101

We did so well with our culinary course that at the end of the evening, we were both knighted "Weber Grill Masters," a longstanding tradition in the Knowlton Family.

Computing - Lesson 101

Whether you use an elaborate software program, an old-fashioned calculator, or an ancient abacus, another fundamental life skill is being able to balance a checkbook. As you can see, Roger got caught asleep at the wheel and failed this exercise miserably.

Actually, I think Rog got tired of crunching numbers and decided to check out potential prospects on eHarmony. After all, he took it pretty hard when his little lady friend Stella left without giving him her contact information - the heartbreaking end of summer love.

Child Rearing - Lesson 101

Since I'm the only intact male in the family, including Dad, with the potential to reproduce, I was designated official diaper duty and honed my skills using Rog as a guinea bat-pig-baby.

After singing his favorite lullaby, "Rock-a-Bye Bat-Pig," to him, I put Rog down for his afternoon nap.

I would like to take this opportunity to remind everyone to never put a bag over your head - no matter what the circumstances.

Wednesday, September 17, 2008

Premature E-postulation

Having turned one-year old last week, it seems as though I am entering a new stage of life. During vacation, I heard Mom exclaim, "OMG, he's ambidextrous! He's not just lifting his right leg but also his left one and christening anything and everything in sight, including bushes, fire hydrants, and even his little brother when he's under the gun, so to speak."

I also overheard M & D discussing my blog posting yesterday. The conversation went something like this:

Dad: Well, it looks likes Newman experienced a definite case of premature e-postulation, today.

Mom: Oh, no. What happened?

Dad: He published the "Double Trouble" post before adding the callout balloons.

Mom: Not a grave error, but hopefully one that he can avoid in the future. I know what a perfectionist he is and how hard he tries to keep his fans up-to-date with cutting-edge news and photos. He'll probably lie awake tonight in bed beating himself up over it.

Dad: Don't worry. I'll talk with him tonight and tell him to not sweat the small stuff. I'll also reassure him that premature e-postulation is a natural response that happens to a lot of adolescent bloggers.

Mom: Thanks. I'm sure we'll all sleep better tonight.

After getting some technical help from my IT Department, I added a few comments to yesterday's photos. So if you haven't seen the captions, you might want to revisit the "Double Trouble" posting.

Tuesday, September 16, 2008

Double Trouble

Don't you just love parents who think it's cute to dress their kids alike even though they aren't twins? Believe me, it's anything but attractive when you're sitting on the dock of the bay watching the tide roll away and you have a bat-eared, pig-dog sitting beside you wearing the exact same duds. Not cool, I tell you.

The sailor suits must be a family thing because my late Grammy Knowlton dressed Dad and Uncle Mike in them, too. At least they are twins!

Being the trend-setting clotheshorse that I am, I have to contend with all the wanna-bee fashion bugs trying to copy my wardrobe. Take for instance, this nasty little Frenchman who purposely positioned himself beside me on the beach sporting the exact same OBK-9 scarf and replica pair of Tommy Holedigger swimming trunks. What's a guy to do when trying to charm the chicks and has to compete with such charlatans?

Thursday, September 11, 2008

Remember 9/11

Roger and I beg of you to observe a moment of silence today in remembrance of the nearly 3,000 innocent people who died on September 11, 2001, during the attacks on our country.

Although we were yet to be born when the assault occurred, M & D have told us stories about how horrible it was. Ironically, they happened to be vacationing in the Outer Barks with our late sister Beulah and remember the day vividly.

Daddy Dog says this of that horrendous day, "What I remember most, besides the actual attacks, was how beautiful the weather was. There wasn't a cloud in the sky and although not in the mood to go to the beach, I gave in to Beulah's plea to go for a walk and get away from the dreadful scenes on the TV.

"What we encountered was not a single soul sitting on the beach relaxing. It wasn't a day for relaxing. It was a day of sadness and mourning. A day that will never be forgotten."
Roger and I plan to proudly display our American flag bandannas today to help raise awareness of Patriot Day. We hope that you will do the same. And remember, flags should be flown at half-staff.

Tuesday, September 9, 2008

They say it's your birthday. It's my birthday too, yeah!

After spending the afternoon lounging by the pool, I was pleasantly surprised to learn that my little older brother Roger had been planning a small birthday celebration in honor of my first birthday. Thanks, Rog. You did a bang up job. The Scooby Doo party hats were definitely a nice touch as indicated by the look on Mom's face. Perhaps that's why Dad offered to serve as cameraman for a change.

Thanks to everyone who sent me birthday wishes. I'd also like to take this opportunity to wish my litter mates, Punchy, Jessie, Juniper, and Marla, a Happy Birthday, too! As you can see, Punchy partied 'til she was pooped.

And Juni, enjoyed her cake after a romp on the beach with her best friend, Nola.

.S. - Jess and Marla - If either of you girls follow my blog, I'd love to see some updated pictures of you. Please send them to

Monday, September 8, 2008

Ruff Surf

Just hours after Tropical Storm Hanna ripped through the Outer Barks, NC, weatherdogs Newman on the Block and his faithful sidekick Roger the Dodger headed to the beach to assess the damage. As you can see from the following video, play on the beach was more than a little "ruff."

Life's still a beach

Roger and I are into our second week of vacation at the beach. We're really starting to get into the groove and could very easily get accustomed to this lifestyle. Perhaps Rog and I could start our own reality TV show and call it Lifestyles of the Not so Rich and Famous or Mister Rodgers' Neighborhood - no wait, I think we might infringe on some copyrighted material with that last title.

Sunday, September 7, 2008

Happy Grandparents Day

Did you know that today is Grandparents Day? The brainchild of West Virginian natives Marian and Joe McQuade, Grandparents Day was first proclaimed a national holiday in 1978 when President Jimmy Carter signed the bill into law designating the first Sunday after Labor Day as national Grandparents Day.

While some cynics might view Grandparents Day as just another money-maker for the card companies, many passionate pups like Rog and me choose to celebrate the occasion with cards and calls to our loved ones. If you haven’t done so already, we urge you to take this opportunity to do the same.

The sun rises and sets with grandparents

Saturday, September 6, 2008

Friday, September 5, 2008

Friday Night Yappy Hour

What's a pup to do in the Outer Barks on a Friday afternoon while waiting for Hurricane Hanna to roll in besides watch Jim Cantore yammer on about the severe conditions on the Weather Channel? Host a Yappy Hour!

It just so happens that my fuzzy cuzzins, Hannah and Cooter, some of the biggest yappers in the world, were also vacationing in the OBX less than five miles from Rog and me. So, we picked up the phone and invited them over for drinks and hors d'oeuvres.

Whether it was out of familial obligation or just plain boredom, Hannah and Cooter gladly accepted the invite and very graciously partook of the complimentary munchies provided by the Lobster Lounge which included wedges of beef flavored RedBarn, chunks of cheddar cheese, and yummy yogurt drops artistically arranged in a smiling sun-shaped face.

Although Yappy Hour is an excellent time to meet new friends, unlike Rog who met a cute little French bitch named Stella, I have yet to encounter any bitches to my liking. However, I have a feeling that if I am lucky enough to ever get any tail, I will have very little say in that matter because it will be one of those prearranged deals - a very small price to pay for being able to keep the family jewels.

Monday, September 1, 2008

Life's a Beach

Roger and I spent our first day on the sandy beach of Corolla, NC, yesterday. Lots of cool stuff to check out. Roger is particularly interested in catching ghost crabs. He's yet to catch one, but that doesn't damper his determination.

Roger on full ghost crab alert

As you know, swimming is not really my forte, so what's a guy gonna do on the beach besides "bitch" watch? Bury his little older brother in the sand!

I'm gonna kill someone when I get outta here.